Brain Health

I have been involved in Pastoral Care and Clinical counseling for a long time. As you may know, the Mood Disorders of Anxiety and Depression are the most frequent emotional struggles humans face. Billions of dollars are spent on medications each year and billions more spent on lost time from work and home duties.

One of the myths about dealing with mood disorders says, "You must rest more. Stress is getting you down." That is not true. Facing and overcoming a mood disorder requires us to get out of bed and take a walk. It means we need to face our issues and work through them. But, we don't feel like it.

One of the myths about reaching the "age of retirement" is similar. It says, "You have worked hard all your life now slow down, stop entirely and retire. Don't do anything but fish, golf and rest."

If you have been a compulsive worker all your adult life that may sound real good. However, "Life without purpose is not worth living." Life without purpose is boring and dull and depressive.

Yesterday a friend told me about a relative who sued her husband for divorce after 53 years. That is shocking to me. The only thing I could think of was they both retired and stayed home all day in each other's space.

There are two major lakes in Israel. The Sea of Galilee and the Dead Sea. The name of the second lake is a give away about the situation. The Sea of Galilee is lush, green and full of fish. Nothing grows in the Dead Sea. Why? Because water flows into and out of the Sea of Galilee but it only flows into the Dead Sea.

Narcissism is a Dead Sea of salts and selfishness. Jesus was psychologically and emotionally correct when He said, "It is more blessed to give than receive." I don't mean compulsive, driven co-dependence but fun, energetic caring relationships that mutually build up all parties. Not works based on having to do but being based on a deep knowledge of God's grace and love.

The danger is withdrawal into self instead of abiding in Christ and relating in love to others.

Don't Retire-Refire!

Ps. During good weather, a group of us plays golf together each week at Sharon Woods. GOLF is God's Outdoor Loving Fellowship! We play, pray and pay for each other.

gsweeten@cinci.rr.com

I Apologise

Forgive Me Lord

As I looked over the Seasoned Believers' blog I found that it actually conveys a feeling that is the opposite of what I believe. Visitors seem to come away with the feeling that I want people to work harder and longer to earn God's favor or at least my favor. Nothing can be farther from the truth. I am so sorry I led you astray.

The key to freedom as a Seasoned Believer is not DOING but BEING.

Another way of saying this is: Performance does not produce Person hood. Person hood results in joyful Performances with God.

Second, BEING/Person hood is not earned, deserved or produced. It is offered freely by a gracious God as a result of our faith in Him.

Third, our BEING/Person hood is caught or recognized and apprehended or appreciated as a result of learning how to abide in the finished work of Christ.

Fourth, we tend to "hit the wall" through a crisis after serving God for several decades. It is not restricted to Baby Boomers but most Boomers have at some time, "Hit the wall".

Fifth, the crisis often slows us down enough for us to seek God in a spiritually transforming manner. We finally begin to understand the passage, "Count it all joy when you encounter various trials..." James 1:2-3

Sixth, Seasoned Believers are at the wall, through the wall or frustrated with the wall and the lack of resources in the church to help them understand the wall in God's plan. DOING more or Performing better will not help us move through the wall.

Seventh, it is our goal to support people as they seek God's guidance and voice through the wall and afterwards.

See you at the wall...

Seasoned Believers is a ministry of Sweeten Life systems, a 501c3 not-for profit faith based charity. (Formerly Life Way Incorporated) P.O. Box 498455, Cincinnati, Ohio 45249

The Life Way Counseling Centers is a separate Clinical Counseling Group organized as a C Corporation. It supports Sweeten Life Systems but the two organizations have no official corporate connections although Dr. Sweeten is the founder of both.

News from the Real World

Kids

I read the electronic Wall Street Journal opininionjournal@wsj.com almost daily and in it I find good writing and articles about life and business and the business of life. Sometimes the articles amaze me. Take a look at this one on the Juggle Blog.

http://blogs.wsj.com/juggle/2007/12/19/balancing-career-and-family-and-disillusion/#comment-26191

There was an opinion piece in yesterday’s Journal that looks at the possible sociological consequences if many women are able to freeze their unfertilized eggs. The author argues that given the choice, many will pursue careers until their 50s, then opt to have children.
One passage, about the disillusionment some women face when trying to balance a career and a family, caught my eye:

Many young men and women go through high school, college and professional school often mistakenly assuming no differences in their respective trajectories . . . When I suggested to a 22-year-old female medical student that she consider a career in anesthesiology because the hours were flexible enough to raise a family, she shot back: “I went to Harvard! Now I’m going to Johns Hopkins! I’m going to be a department chairman someday! And you want to put me on the mommy track?”

Seven years later, when this woman applied for a job as an anesthesiologist, the first question she asked me was: “I’m trying to have a baby. Can I go part time?

The author concludes that egg freezing will allow women “the freedom to leisurely follow the male career trajectory . . . no more lurching from Harvard to the mommy track.”

As "Seasoned Citizens" how do you respond to this article? How would you like to start your family at age 50, frozen eggs and all? I am sure a lot of our readers are 50 and older. I am happy to have grand kids now but I only have enough energy and resilience to care for them a day or two before I run out of steam. As Lily, the five year old said, "Papa sleeps a lot."

One of the things we do is try to offer wisdom and support to our kids and grand kids. I was driven to succeed; to be somebody when I was a young dad. Because of my driven lifestyle in the ministry I missed a lot of things with my kids. But, we traveled together and I made sure I coached all of Tim's teams, even soccer.

We lived several hundred miles from our parents. I wish we had been closer. Now I see how important grand parents can be.

Karen and I try to be with our kids and grand kids whenever we can. Last night we had a wonderful time at a Christmas program at Lily's church school. It was great to see her. Jacob sat next to us singing with his sister and going through the liturgy like a pro. Nothing can be better than that.

Last week we drove to Pittsburgh to be with Jack as Tim and Shelley had places to go. In a year or so we will drive up there to see him sing at a Christmas program. We would gladly fly to California if necessary. We love it because we love our kids and grand kids. I am thankful they did not wait until age 50 to start having kids. We could not see them or be with them if they did.

Any comments? Write me at gsweeten@cinci.rr.com

Is The Customer Always Right?

Over the past few years I have focused most of my time and energy on the group I have come to call, Seasoned Believers, folks whose lives have been spent following God as best they know how. This group has had a lot of experience with God, Churches, Para-Church Groups and assorted trials and tribulations. They have lost their idealism without losing their faith.

It is our goal to develop materials, products, experiences and events that will minister deeply to the hearts and souls of these well experienced Christians, whether in the church or out. One way we are attempting to do that is by asking Seasoned Believers what would be helpful to them. However, I find it is difficult to get an answer.

Most choose not to answer our surveys and others just complain about past failures.

When Seasoned Believers hear me describe our ministry, they sometimes get defensive. I taught a class last year about "Hearing God's Call" and interviewed several members before teaching. I asked them, "What would you like me to cover in this class?"

I was not shocked but I was surprised by most of the responses. Many came out like this:

"Why is the Pastor doing this? Have we not done enough already?"

"I am already giving, leading a group and attending every service. Isn't that enough?"

"Gary, why are you pressuring us to do more? I have served the Lord for years and I am tired."

You get the point. But, it was not the point I was trying to make. I had something quite the opposite in mind. Can you guess what my goal was?

What would be helpful to your group of friends?

Hit the comment button or write me at gsweeten@cinci.rr.com

Now is the Time

Two Baby Boomers Trying to Serve

I made many bad decisions in my youth but one of the best decisions I made was to take a class in typing. Typing was not a popular class among boys. Everybody knows that it is a job for secretaries and all secretaries are girls.

I really do not remember why I decided to take typing. Maybe it was because Clinton Noren did and I admired him. Clinton was smart and he seemed to be ahead of the rest of us in making good decisions. Well, anyway, I did take a typing class.

The typing teacher had us type one phrase over and over. Do any of you remember what it was? As best that I recall, it went like this: Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their party. (Or was it "...aid of their country"?)

Well, "Now is the time for all good believers to come to the aid of their kingdom." God has brought you to Himself and prepared you for this time in life. You are healthy, wealthy and wise, just as old Ben Franklin suggested. So what is holding you back?

I am showing photos of President Bush and Senator Clinton, two Believers who have taken their call so seriously they are serving in the highest offices of the land. If many of my friends have their way, Senator Clinton will be the first female President. I strongly affirm Christian politicians of all persuasions to get involved in public service. Hooray for them.

Maybe you are already performing at the full abilities of your combined talents, wisdom, knowledge and gifts. That must keep you very fulfilled. The only way to be "In the Zone" of perfection is to be actively involved in things that stretch you emotionally, spiritually and in using your talent/gift mix fully.

Number 10 of the top ten changes is, Ready for an Awakening. When millions of Seasoned Believers are empowered and unleashed to be fully alive and fully engaged in service, the Fourth Great Awakening will be upon us. Are you ready? I am.

Shift Number 9

The Christian and church world has shifted radically over the last forty years. This has great implications for us Seasoned Believers. People like me must take care lest these shifts cause a series of angry conflicts between and among various generations and groups.

For example, the research from Willow Creek about how well or badly their churches were performing was cause for some to attack the church, the association of churches and the ways Willow had been approaching outreach, preaching and discipleship. Many others saw it as an opportunity to learn from the research and ask God for guidance about their own approach to evangelism and growth.

One thing is for sure, there are many opportunities for tension, attacks and misunderstandings between various schools of Christian thought. The research by Barna [barnagroup@barna.org] and others is refreshingly frank about our strengths, weaknesses and areas of needed growth. I agree with Barna and Willow that we have been less than successful in training Christians how to face and overcome personal problems and how to thrive in an anti-Christian culture.

If there are over forth million born again Christians in America one would have to wonder why we are not more successful at positively affecting our culture. However, defensive attacks on each other or on the "world" will not improve our influence. We need to analyze our successes and failures and make the changes necessary to improve in the future.

I hope Seasoned Believers with experience in business, industry, scientific research, education and counseling as well as all other fields will come together to improve our churches and para-church organizations. We who have been seasoned by life and training have so many resources that can improve God's agents of ministry that we cannot pass up the opportunities God is providing.

Start thinking about the ways you can use your gifts, experiences and talents to enhance and strengthen future generations.